hmmm

this is just another filler for my blog and another stress reducer for my heart

so you know that i'm on my 11th year of high school. And it is very clear that the higher you are, then the pressure is also getting higher. Here, at the place that i'm at, the pressure is just soooooooooo high. Why? Can/t you handle this?

Actually i think i thought i can. The effort that has been given is too damn high as usual. Not to mention, i enjoy my study, i really do. Especially when it comes to chemistry. But.. why? still, i got a grave scores. It clearly did not make any fucking sense. Why? And i can not express how pissed of i am until now. Yes, i'm still pissed off. Now i'm being more aware than before with the cunning fucking people.

Why the fuck am i pissed off? YES, INDEED I AM. arrrrghhhhh i just want to be on top, want people to notice that i could, i want my effort got paid off. And the most important things, i want to make my parents proud. I know that thy never want me to make such a high scores because they obviously knew how it is like to study in my school. They even don't get it why i am depressed. They are the best parents ever but what am i? The worst child ever it is. I can not give them happiness, only make things worse.

And now that i'm on the eleventh year, i'm just getting busier with university. I don't know where i'll be going. Maybe all of you just like "Yaelah, lebay anjing masih lama juga. YOLO", Sorry, i'm an anti-mainstream person, and FOR GOD'S SAKE DON'T SAY YOLO!!! Yeah i clearly can't tell about this here but i just wanted you to know that i got problem here hahaha


bye, winners (because i'm a loser then you're the winners)

Cheers